Universal Truths

I came across these “truths” back in1997. I think that they are still true.

1. If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all the evidence that you ever tried.
   
2. A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
   
3. He who hesitates is probably right.
   
4. No one is listening; that is, until you make a mistake.
   
5. Success always occurs in private; failure is in full view.
   
6. The colder the X-ray table, the longer you will be required to lie on it.
   
7. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research. (I posted something similar back in 2008- “Interesting tidbits of sports trivia”)
   
8. To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your principles.
   
9. Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your life.
   
10. The light at the end of the tunnel is usually caused by the headlight of an approaching train.
    

The site where I got these doesn’t appear to be “there” anymore so I guess it is safe to put these up.